11 Ways To Stop Obsessing

11 ways to stop obsessing
It’s 2am and you’re up thinking…
ruminating and thinking and obsessing like a record that’s stuck and keeps repeating the same lyrics over and over again…”I’m a loser. What if it doesn’t work out? I f’d up. I f’d up.”
Obsessing, also called “ruminating,” is over-thinking, repeating unanswerable questions, retracing past mistakes, and it’s dangerous…
11 ways to stop obsessing
I was on the phone with my client Amy, and she shared with me that she had been up all night obsessively worrying about a financial issue. Other times, she admitted, she got stuck in thought loops about weight loss and how her body “should just be different.”
In the past, Amy had used food and “midnight snacking” to help calm these obsessive thoughts. But this time, she did her best to get back to bed, and felt really good about herself for not engaging in the binge eating she used to.
Binge eating is often just a tool some of us use to drown out the obsessive thoughts, an action we can take that distracts us.

But we don’t really need the food. Our bodies may crave food because “she” knows the anxiety from the obsessions will go away if we eat…and overeat…

What we really need, and what I shared with Amy, is ways to stop obsessing.
Rather than thinking of happy, positive events over and over again, which lead us to well-being, self love, and confidence, we humans tend to conjure up more and more negative thoughts in a cycle of self-loathing and anxiety.
Research shows that obsessive thoughts and rumination are associated with binge-eating, binge-drinking, anxiety, depression, and more.
Obsessing and ruminating are the path to feeling helpless and worthless.
It paralyzes your problem solving skills so you only focus on the bad, and never have the confidence, clarity or creativity to think up new solutions.

Here are 11 ways to stop obsessing, and get out of ruminating: 

  1. See it. Just the fact that you’ve realized you’re ruminating (and that it isn’t helping) is the first step. As my G.I. Joe cartoon used to say every Saturday morning, “knowing is half the battle!”
  2. Laugh about it! Find something funny about the situation. Humor can help you see an issue from a new perspective so you can move on. Imagine you’re in a screwball comedy and this situation is happening to Maya Rudolph or Mae
  3. Be your friend. What would you say to a dear friend facing the same situation? This can help you treat yourself more compassionately. If you have done something wrong, or made a mistake, forgive yourself as you would with a friend, with the same heart and love.
  4. Reality check. Focus only on things you have control over. Life is so big and complex, there will always be things we have uncertainty around. Try to take a “pronoia” stance – the idea that the world is on your side and the Universe has your back – the opposite of “paranoia.”
  5. Accept your sadness or fear. We all have sadness, fear, or anger. If you can accept that this is a part of living, and that it won’t last forever (neither life nor the current emotion), and stop trying to make things different, can you just settle into the emotion and feel it fully? Feelings often dissolve if we allow ourselves to fully feel them.
  6. Stop it! Ever just say that out loud to yourself? Parent yourself as if you were a kid about to do something really harmful. Stop it, kid! Sometimes we just need a wake up call to jolt us out of a daze.
  7. Get here now. As the Dali Llama said, “There are only two times you can’t do anything: the past and the future.” Center yourself in the hear and how, and focus on one action you can take for your well-being, rather than trying to answer unanswerable questions like “why did that happen?”
  8. Get distracted. I know, it’s totally different from #7, but getting distracted can get you off a train of thought at this station, right now! When you engage in activities that fill your mind with other thoughts, preferably positive ones, the obsessive thoughts will fade. What’s something fun, relaxing, pleasurable, or useful you could do right now? What’s an awesome funny movie you could watch to start laughing? Do you have a creative outlet? Have you given yourself pleasure via movement, masturbation, or play lately?
  9. See your thoughts for what they are: just thoughts. And you are not your thoughts! Thank goddess – I can’t tell you how many times my brain has conjured up terrible images of what could happen to my kid on the way home from school. Examine your thoughts with curiosity and without judgment – what can you learn from this and what is just an emotion?
  10. One last time, with feeling. Tell yourself “ok, self: I’ll let you think about this one more time but this time we are coming up with a plan about what to do next!” Hear the plan, then take action. None of this is helpful if you don’t act.
  11. Worry time. Make a plan to obsess for 15 minutes at a specific time in the next 24-hours. You’ve set aside some time for it, and you don’t have to be stuck in these thoughts right now if you booked a spot to dive back into the pit.
As you look towards the possibilities this new way of thinking has for you, including all the personal desires and cravings that call to you, I want to extend my hand and offer myself as a part of your circle of support.

 When I’m looking at making a big change, or taking on a new way of being, or when I want something that just feels beyond my ability to create, I will raise my hand, phone a friend, shout out loud “HELP!”

If you are in this space, with visions and hope for a future that glows with self-love, joy, freedom, peace and energy, then I welcome you to go. for. it.

Feel into the image that you see and feel, and seek the support you need to make the transformation real.


If you have been wanting me on hand to support you in a one-on-one, personal way, here’s your opportunity:


As part of my mission to help women (and the men who love us) to live into our desires and natural state of health, I’m doing something different and offering a COMPLIMENTARY 30-minute 1-on-1 personalized Vitality Discovery Session with me.

Yes!
That’s 30 minutes of personalized, uninterrupted time with me without costing you a cent.

I will help you discover what difference you want to see in your life from dropping the extra pounds and feeling free with food.
AND what’s holding you back from getting what you want.

We’ll intentionally approach these topics with love, kindness, and compassion – those good thoughts that helped my garden flourish! Let’s skip the extra shame and frustration, shall we? :)

Then, we’ll make a plan to get you what you want, in a new, honorable, unique way. Joy, play, fun, pleasure, and a soulful plan of action.

I know you could spend 30 minutes doing something else – email, laundry, chores, drinking wine and eating chocolate…anything.
Yet, I believe that when you and I spend time in this conversation, we can weave magic and a new way of living in and loving your body.

I have space for 10 Vitality Discovery Sessions, and if you feel called, I hope you’ll take me up on this very special invitation.

Click here to answer a few simple questions. If it feels like a good fit, someone on my team will be in touch in 48 hours after the submission deadline to set up your free session. The deadline is Monday, July 20th.

How to get your thoughts to change your body (and life)

Can you think your way thin?

Maybe.

Do your thoughts affect your body, how you eat, and your metabolism? YES. #HealthYeah.

What you think is as powerful as what you eat

What you think is as powerful as what you eat

 

Case in point: my flower pots.

Now, I know you’ve heard the sayings –

“Whether you think you can, or you think you can’t–you’re right.” – Henry Ford

“The only thing more dangerous than an idea is a belief.” – Sarah Vowell

“If you realized how powerful your thoughts are, you would never think a negative thought.” – Peace Pilgrim

I’ve been reading E2by Pam Grout. It’s an entertaining book on energy experiments that “prove your thoughts create your reality.” Bold statement, right?

I decided to put one of Pam’s experiments to the test, and enrolled my 8 year old son, various friends, and my garden into the plan.

The experiment is based on old wisdom that our thoughts have energy and power, and the basic premise is this:

  • Give good energy, words and thoughts to something and it will bloom, heal, and grow in a positive way.
  • Give bad energy, words, and thoughts to something and it will suffer, wither, and mutate in a negative way.

I took two identical pots, filled them with soil from the same bag of dirt, planted 4 nasturtium seeds from the same packet, placed them next to each other, and began the experiment.

Every day as I watered my garden, I would count to 3, sprinkling each pot with the same amount of water. Then I would say loving things to the pot on the left, while saying mean, nasty things to the pot on the right.

Some days my son would come upstairs and “yell at the seeds” with me. He got a real kick out of it. When I had friends over, I would invite them to be nice to the left pot, and mean to the right pot, and we would kind of gang up on or befriend the germinating seeds.

The results were staggering:

The “happy pot” flourished, and 2 of the 4 nasturtium seeds germinated into flowering plants. Grass and edible Lamb’s Quarters, and edible weed, sprouted as well.

The “bad pot” floundered. None of the 4 nasturtium seeds sprouted, and only a few weeds took root.

I have to admit, it was hard to be mean to the “bad pot” – every day I walked away from the experiment feeling a little gross.

Being openly mean to anything living feels gross.

But we do that to our bodies every day, don’t we?

And the energetic affect on your body, metabolism, and ability to be truly healthy is staggering:

  • You can think yourself well: the placebo effect demonstrates how the power of positive thinking, hope, and nurturing care can cause healing. The “nocebo” effect demonstrates the physiological effects of negative belief, fear, anxiety, and what Martin Seligman terms “learned helplessness.”
  • You can either stress, or you can digest: when you are stuck in a stressful state of mind, your digestion (and metabolism) shut down or are impared
  • Negative thoughts and emotions trigger the amygdala in your brain to send out a red alert that activates a “fight-or-flight” stress response. When the nervous system is in “fight-or-flight,” the body’s self-repair mechanisms don’t function properly and the body is predisposed to illness. This can happen even just from thinking “people in my family get sick/cancer/arthritis, etc.”
  • Every time you think harsh, cruel, or negative thoughts about your body or your health, you’re potentially poisoning your body with stress hormones that deactivate your body’s natural self-repair mechanisms. You wouldn’t chug from a bottle with a skull and crossbones on it, but we are habituated to thinking terrible things about our bodies.

Once you replace negative thoughts with positive ones, you’ll start having positive results.
~ Willie Nelson, my favorite outlaw cowboy singer

 

You Are The Artist Of Your Life, You Are The Gatekeeper Of Your Body

It’s up to you to think differently.

It’s within your power to grow a flourishing garden in your cells and your soul.

 

What thoughts do you choose to think about your body?

Your thoughts to yourself can heal…

…or your thoughts to yourself can damage.

Your thoughts to your body can uplift and re-energize…

…or your thoughts to your body can degrade and shame.

Your thoughts about yourself can transform your life, your relationship with food, and your future for the better…

…or your thoughts can turn it into (or keep it) a real shit show.

As you look towards the possibilities this new way of thinking has for you, including all the personal desires and cravings that call to you, I want to extend my hand and offer myself as a part of your circle of support.

To be totally honest, I’ve accomplished a lot in my life, in many realms, but NONE of it, have I done alone.

When I’m looking at making a big change, or taking on a new way of being, or when I want something that just feels beyond my ability to create, I will raise my hand, phone a friend, shout out loud “HELP!”

If you are in this space, with visions and hope for a future that glows with self-love, joy, freedom, peace and energy, then I welcome you to go. for. it. 

Feel into the image that you see and feel, and seek the support you need to make the transformation real.

If you have been wanting me on hand to support you in a one-on-one, personal way, here’s your opportunity:

As part of my mission to help women (and the men who love us) to live into our desires and natural state of health, I’m doing something different and offering a COMPLIMENTARY 30-minute 1-on-1 personalized Vitality Discovery Session with me.

Yes!

That’s 30 minutes of personalized, uninterrupted time with me without costing you a cent.

I will help you discover what difference you want to see in your life from dropping the extra pounds and feeling free with food.

AND what’s holding you back from getting what you want.

We’ll intentionally approach these topics with love, kindness, and compassion – those good thoughts that helped my garden flourish! Let’s skip the extra shame and frustration, shall we? :)

Then, we’ll make a plan to get you what you want, in a new, honorable, unique way. Joy, play, fun, pleasure, and a soulful plan of action.

I know you could spend 30 minutes doing something else – email, laundry, chores, drinking wine and eating chocolate…anything.

Yet, I believe that when you and I spend time in this conversation, we can weave magic and a new way of living in and loving your body.

I have space for 10 Vitality Discovery Sessions, and if you feel called, I hope you’ll take me up on this very special invitation.

Click here to answer a few simple questions. If it feels like a good fit someone on my team will be in touch in 48 hours after the submission deadline to set up your free session. The deadline is Monday, July 20th.

xo,

Alex

P.S. Though I am a big lover and student of digital learning (video learning, etc,) I’ve personally received many of the biggest breakthroughs of my life through one-on-one conversations. That’s one of the reasons I love working with women (and a few cool dudes) on such an intimate basis. When you are deeply seen and heard, held and understood, and then expertly guided, lives can and do transform, and quickly. Click here to take me up on this FREE offer.

45 Dr. Tami – How to Take Back Control of Your Hormones

Dr. Tami on The Cravings Whisperer with Alexandra Jamieson

The Cravings Whisperer Podcast with Alexandra Jamieson

Are you tired but having trouble sleeping through the night? Does stress get to you more than it used to? Are you having trouble keeping your muscle tone? Are your cravings through the roof?

Have you thought about getting your hormones checked? After a super stressful year, that’s what I did, and let me tell you, my hormones were a mess! Once I started taking hormone supplements everything turned around.

On this week’s episode, I talked to Dr. Tami, a hormone EXPERT! Her book The Hormone Secret really helped me understand the relationship between my adrenals and testosterone, and how to get my whole body balanced and back on track.

SS2 (1)

You can do it too! Listen in to learn more about the effects hormone imbalance can have on your body, and pick up a copy of Dr. Tami’s book to start learning all about how to get yourself back on track. Plus, if you send a picture of your receipt or book to bookbonus@drtami.com, you can score some great bonus materials.

Today’s sponsor is Audible.com®, who has more than 180,000 audiobooks and spoken-word audio products. Get a free audiobook of your choice here.

So my crave bears, let’s take back our hormones!

You can Subscribe to the podcast on iTunesSoundCloudStitcher or TuneIn

Who aspires to be fine? To wake up in the morning and say, “I can’t wait to be fine”?”  (Click to Tweet)

Show Notes:

  • How women are hijacked by our hormones
  • Why connecting with other people is so important
  • What are the symptoms of hormone problems
  • Why women should start getting their hormone levels checked in their late 20s
  • Why your adrenal glands are so important
  • The importance of cleaning out the inflammation caused by stress
  • Why you should prioritize your health
  • How testosterone affects women
  • The importance of testosterone in fitness, energy, libido, and mood

Your adrenal glands can either deal with and produce the hormones that stress your life or bless your life.”  (Click to Tweet)

  • What supplements boost testosterone levels
  • The interaction of daydreams or fantasies and testosterone levels
  • Why women should exercise “softer”
  • Why we should all stand in a superman pose more often
  • The danger of cravings
  • How dangerous is sugar?
  • What your body and adrenals need during that afternoon lull
  • Why we have become fat in our low fat, non fat lifestyle
  • The range of reaction time to hormone adjustment

Within 2 hours of eating sugar, your testosterone levels drop by almost 40%!”  (Click to Tweet)

Links Mentioned:

 Facebook | Twitter | Instagram | Pinterest

Don’t slap your adrenals across the face with caffeine and sugar!”  (Click to Tweet)

 

Summer Soup + Salvation

avocado zucchini soup

avocado zucchini soup

Here’s what I love about nature and life:

We really do have access to what we need when we need it. And Life really is out to help us.

Case in point: summer cooling foods.

In the hot summer months, nature grows foods like cucumber, zucchini, and watermelon which are naturally cooling.

In the cold of winter, seasonal veggies include warming pumpkins, sweet potatoes, and other root vegetables.

Usually, what we’re looking for is right in front of us, and Life (AKA God/Universe) has our back.

I’m a big believer in pronoia. Pronoia is the antidote for paranoia. It’s the belief that the Universe is out to help you, and that life is fundamentally loving and friendly.

So rather than worry, rail and complain against the summer heat, limiting beliefs, economic fears, political upheavals, and an endless stream of Kardashian-inspired pop culture crap, I choose to look at what is going well and what resources are immediately available to me.

So healthy foods that help you feel the way you want to feel are a lot like life choices – the small choices have the big, long-term impact:

  • I’d rather watch inspiring movies like Advanced Style and Happy than shame-inducing reality TV…
  • I’d rather eat a sweet, cooling snack like sliced jicama than get an iced Frapa-crappa-cccino.
  • I spend my time with friends who lift me up rather than drag me down or degrade me.
  • I can give myself the pleasure and play my body craves, rather than try to shop/buy my way to joy.
  • And this summer, I’ll eat the cooling, seasonal foods that are easy to prepare, taste good, and help me feel great.

It’s a good recipe for life, and a good recipe for soup.

Avocado Zucchini Soup:

1 pound zucchini (about 2 medium) roughly chopped

1 avocado, peeled and pitted

1 cup peeled and chopped cucumber

1/2 small yellow onion

1 cup unsweetened almond milk or organic buttermilk

1/2 cup packed basil leaves

1 clove garlic, peeled

1 tablespoon fresh lemon zest

2 tablespoons fresh lemon juice

2 tablespoons extra virgin olive oil

1/2 teaspoon sea salt

1/2 teaspoon freshly ground black pepper

Directions:

Combine all in a blender and blend until smooth!

Top with optional drizzle of olive oil, basil leaves, or edible flowers like nasturtiums.

44 Twenty Questions to Reframe Your Negative Thinking

The Cravings Whisperer with Alexandra Jamieson

The Cravings Whisperer Podcast with Alexandra Jamieson

Do you have negative thoughts plaguing you and your health?

Do you have emotional obstacles that keep you from your highest goals and continue to send you into a downward spiral?

Well… Never fear, The Crave Cast is here!

Today I share with you a series of questions I recently used with a client who was dealing with this situation. I teach you how to get unstuck from negative thought loops and how to stay on track with your healthy eating.

Also, I’m excited to share today’s sponsor Audible.com®, who has more than 180,000 audio books and spoken-word audio products. Get a free audio book of your choice here.

Now let’s get out of our negative thinking and get back into action!

You can Subscribe to the podcast on iTunes, SoundCloud, Stitcher or TuneIn

“Look for your strengths, stop focusing on all your weaknesses.” (Click to Tweet)

Show Notes:

  1. What’s the evidence: Are you confusing fact with a story?
  2. Am I jumping to conclusions: Are you basing things on poor evidence?
  3. What are the alternate possibilities: Remember there’s more way than one!
  4. What’s the effects in my body of thinking this way: Who are you being?
  5. What are the good and bad things about thinking this way: Do the disadvantages outweigh the advantages?
  6. Am I asking questions to which there are no answers: Skip the questions that have no answers
  7. What thinking errors am I making: Am I applying black and white thinking to myself?
  8. Am I using an ultimatum or extreme words: Cut out the exaggeration
  9. Am I condemning myself on the basis of a single event: It’s not fair to judge yourself
  10. Am I concentrating on my weaknesses and forgetting about my strengths: Keep a balanced view of yourself!
  11. Are you blaming yourself for something that is not your fault: Start controlling your eating to support a good mood
  12. Am I taking things personal that have nothing to do with me: Is it directed at you or is this indicative to someone else’s personality?
  13. Am I expecting myself to be perfect: Learn from your mistakes
  14. Am I using a double standard: Be kind to others and help them find a solution
  15. Do I only pay attention to the negative: Remember the good things!
  16. Am I catastrophizing: Overestimating the chances of disaster does not serve you
  17. Am I exaggerating the importance of these events: Will I remember this next week?
  18. Am I stressed out about the way things should be instead of excepting and dealing with them as they are: What good can you focus on to make things/yourself feel better
  19. Am I assuming I can do nothing to change my situation: Be brave, try something different and work out some attainable step by step solutions
  20. Am I predicting the future instead of trying: Change is not impossible and remember that practise makes perfect

“It is better to focus on what you have done, not what you have failed at.” (Click to Tweet)

Links Mentioned:

“Bravery means being afraid and doing something anyway.” (Click to Tweet)

43 How to Overcome Self Sabotaging Habits For a Happy, Healthy Body

The Cravings Whisperer with Alexandra Jamieson

The Cravings Whisperer Podcast with Alexandra Jamieson

Do you keep making health goals that you just can’t seem to keep? Do you have desires that you, or someone else in your life keep sabotaging?

Well today’s episode is all about self sabotage and getting clear on what’s really going on in our mind, body and soul. We explore why we do what we do and continue to self sabotage our diet, weight loss and exercise.

This is my first coaching podcast with a member of my past Rapid, Refresh & Reboot program.  I talk with Toni about what’s going on in her life, where the sabotage was coming from and how she can feel good in her body.

I’ve also created a special 9 page report on how to get clear on your fears and the sabotage in your life. Get your free copy of my Playbook here.

Today’s sponsor is Audible.com®, who has more than 180,000 audiobooks and spoken-word audio products. Get a free audiobook of your choice here.

So my clan of the brave bears, it’s time to get clear about your fear and just do it anyway. Bring on the change and get comfortable, being uncomfortable!

You can Subscribe to the podcast on iTunes, SoundCloud, Stitcher or TuneIn

“I’d finally have peace with myself… This freedom of movement.” (Click to Tweet)

Show Notes:

  • Where does self sabotage come from
  • What are the emotions we deal with around sabotage
  • Why we let fear destroy our desires
  • How to understand the Saboteur
  • The 2 different kinds of sabotage
  • The struggle between fear and success
  • Why we desire acceptance
  • The good and bad reasons to getting what you want
  • The importance of feeling congruent and aligned on the inside and outside
  • What we think and feel about ourselves changes how others interact with us
  • How to develop resilience and shift your mindset

“It’s about feeling good in your own skin.” (Click to Tweet)

  • What are mirror neurones?
  • Why to develop an awareness practise
  • How our emotions show up on our waistline…. just like chocolate cake!
  • What is a functional strategy?
  • The value in letting go of the story…. Hint: You’ll still be safe!
  • How to embrace possibilities and the feeling of being safe in the world
  • Tools to make conscious, positive choices
  • Why it’s so difficult to acknowledge and savour the good
  • How the psychological impact of long term unemployment effected Toni
  • The hard fact: Be stressed OR digest and loose weight
  • How to tackle stress reduction = a relaxation routine
  • The benefits of planning and keeping an appointment with ourselves

“Even if I know it and don’t have to go show it, I know I feel good, sexy and feminine about myself.” (Click to Tweet)

Links Mentioned:

“I’m a person and I want to be accepted and loved whether I’m skinny or huge.” (Click to Tweet)

Are you ready to ACTUALLY change your life? 3 Key Psychological Insights

Are you ready to
The topic of “change” has been coming up in a lot of conversations
lately – with clients, with my 8.5 year old son, with my fiancé…
(OMG – did I tell you all yet?! He asked! I said Yes! More on that later…)
Are you ready to
We want change, yet we crave security.
We want newness, and we want certainty.
We want juicy fun in our relationships, yet we’re afraid to step out and truly be seen.
We want to look and feel better in our bodies, yet we don’t have the required motivation.
We want to love ourselves, yet we beat ourselves up for every tiny misstep…
Confidence…
Healthy body image…
Motivation…
Authenticity…
Getting off sugar and healing your gut…
…we want these, yet they feel far out of reach.
To get any of these requires us to change in some way…
And change is, at it’s core, terrifying.
 
Change scares us, because we are terrified of failing, 
and being judged or exiled by the people around us.
 
When you begin living and acting in a new way, you face the rejection
or alienation from the friends, family, and colleagues who shared your old ideas.
Yet we struggle, because we know we need to change what we’re doing,
how we are eating, living, and talking to ourselves in our thoughts…
You know you need/want to change in order to finally feel really good and free in your body.
But choosing WHAT to change, and how to go about it, feels overwhelming
in the face of failure and public shaming.
 
I believe we can learn new things and new behaviors,
no matter our age,
no matter our circumstances,
no matter our history,
new ways of eating and thinking and feeling about
ourselves and food…but why don’t we?
 

1. To learn a new behavior or skill requires a bit of struggle + willingness to fail. 

I didn’t speak Spanish growing up, and I had to be willing to make mistakes by speaking badly in front of my college classmates in order to learn. I didn’t know how to dice an onion, and had to risk losing a finger and presenting misshaped food to my culinary school teachers, but I had to be willing to try and fail until I did it enough times to master the skill.
 
If you don’t know how to cook, yet you know you need to start taking control over
what you put in your body three times a day, it’s helpful to know that you’ll make some
mistakes.
 
If you don’t know how to change your mindset from “fixed” and negative to more “growth” oriented and positive, it’s helpful to know that you’ll still get stuck in negative thought loops until you’re more practiced at seeing your habits.
Joyfully knowing a new skill or way of thinking takes a “beginner’s mind” – just as a toddler learning to walk doesn’t cuss itself out for tumbling over, we need to have a safe, supportive, more experienced friend who can guide us to keep trying as we learn.
You’ll know that you’re learning something really new and challenging when it takes a long time and you’re constantly making mistakes and struggling…
And creating a new mindset in this current culture of food and body shame requires a lion’s heart and a lot of angels! 
 
But I believe you can do it, because I’ve seen hundreds of people do it before.
Which brings me too…

2. Find your guide and your tribe.

Learning all these new skills can be really discouraging on your own.
I know left to my own devices, I would have given up on Spanish or cooking, and I wouldn’t have advanced as far as I did with my teachers and friends.
When your enthusiasm and motivation falters,
you need someone you trust who will be there to help pull you up.
When you change your life, it often means you need to change your community,
which is a lot harder than not eating sugar for a couple of weeks.
The best guides, angels, and communities do a lot more than just demonstrate a new skill or technique:
They inspire hope by sharing their belief in you.
They point out the small successes and improvements you’ve made, which you forget about.
They support you no matter what you discover about yourself, and encourage your growth + change.
They sell you on your own competence and your own potential.
They teach you the positive psychology of growth and realistic optimism.
But it’s important to find your guides and angels.
They need to feel like a good fit, and you need to feel a real sense of connection.
To find your tribe of guides and angels, look for people who respect your growth, understand you, and believe in you…
those are the people who will inspire you to stick out the struggles.

3. Be willing to believe.

 
In order to actually, really, finally change anything (body, mind, spirit, life) you must be willing
to put down the old idea that you can’t change.
That’s why community and support from outside yourself is so all-fired important!
I needed coaching and  new relationships with the right people to:
– change my relationship with money + start saving money wisely
– change my relationship with my body + start loving myself, quirks and all
– change my relationship with things + let the clutter and retail therapy go
I actively sought out the coaches, mentors, classes, and guides that helped me
heal, grow, and change.
You can either wait for change to happen to you, or
you can actively seek the change you truly desire.
Real, lasting change depends on relationships.
Finding your “change agent” is like finding your perfect mate.
It’s hit-or-miss, and takes some time, hope, grit, and dedication.
And when you find that community, coach, or relationship, a world of change is possible.
We all need different first steps, different coaches, and different plans.
Yet even with our differences, we are all in the same boat:
Because we all desire to be our most authentic, healthiest, happiest possible selves.
That’s what I want for you, and that’s why I do what I do.
Because the future is shaped by those of us who believe we are capable of
change, growth, and discovering new ways of living.
In a few days I’ll be sharing a special offer with you to help you make lasting changes this summer.
So keep an eye on your inbox on Wednesday…

Now, I want to hear about what you’re inspired to change or transform this summer:

In the comments below, share with us your relationship with “change.”

What are you inspired to shift in your life?
What are your biggest heart’s desires that scare you?
Then we can all honor, witness, and support you as you step into that change this summer.
xo,
Alex

Body Love, Soul Food. {join Alex in LA Saturday, June 13th}

Life in this body hasn’t always been easy…

…sugar addiction

…scoliosis, pain, and 2-years in a back brace

…sexual shame and divorce

…vegan to non-vegan

Surviving the waves of our lives take a lot of strength and self- knowing.

From the age of 5 my mom taught me yoga, how to eat and cook seasonal organic foods, how to use massage and alternative medicine to care for my physical and emotional pain, which helped me avoid the pain killers and Prozac I was headed for.

 

The tools are there for all of us, if we just know how to find + use them.

Tools for healing our bodies…

tools for healing our relationship with food…

tools for healing our disconnected souls by coming into fun community with others…

there is so much to learn!

Come and join me, SoulScape Journeys, and a group of wellness warriors in LA for my first ever west coast Soul Food Session “play shop.”

soulscape journey

In this 4-hour group experience, you’ll:

– get clear about what your body is really asking for when cravings strike

– discover new foods to help balance your energy, mind and body

– live coaching to foster healing insights and new action plans

– finally know what kind of exercise is best for your unique body

– heal past wounds that are lurking in your physical self, and…

— fall in love with living in your body on a new level.

We’ll begin at 1pm at Indigo Lab LA, and I invite you to join us.

Get your tickets and information here: 

 

You’ll leave knowing so much more about what your body is telling you, so that you can make the best food and lifestyle choices…

You’ll feel safe and free of shame, able to connect with others on a deeper level…

You’ll be free to step into your strengths, with a new community of friends who have your back.

Join us for this live experience, June 13th, 1pm-5pm in L.A!

42 Claire Cavanah – Founding Mama of The Masturbation Movement

Claire Cavanah on The Cravings Whisperer with Alexandra Jamieson

The Cravings Whisperer Podcast with Alexandra Jamieson

We’ve talked a lot about masturbation in the last month, haven’t we my crave bears?

So now let’s learn a little more about the history of this momentous occasion. This week, I interviewed Claire Cavanah, co-founder of Babeland and Babeland.com. She was an integral part of the creation of National Masturbation Month, and has some great insights into what the landscape of sexuality and masturbation was like twenty years ago.

Her business is also a wealth of information! You can visit the website for plenty of educational blog posts, to find out about workshops, or you can head into a store in NYC or Seattle like I did with one of my clients.

Today’s sponsor is Audible.com®, who has more than 180,000 audiobooks and spoken-word audio products. Get a free audiobook of your choice here.

I can’t wait for you to hear this fascinating interview with Claire Cavanah.

You can Subscribe to the podcast on iTunesSoundCloudStitcher or TuneIn

“Everyone needs to come to it in their own time to find out what you want and who you are sexually.”  (Click to Tweet)

Show Notes:

  • How to open a sex store
  • How National Masturbation Month was founded
  • What is a masturbate-a-thon
  • What the sexual landscape was like twenty years ago
  • How the internet changed sexual education
  • Why sexual knowledge used to be on the fringes
  • Why queer people have to talk about sex more than straight people
  • How knowing yourself sexually can give you energy
  • The benefits of masturbation include better circulation, better sleep, relief from menstrual cramps, stress reduction

“There’s no roadmap for queer sex that’s available.”  (Click to Tweet)

  • How to talk to your kids about sex and masturbation
  • Why masturbation is a foundation for better sex with your partner
  • How to talk to your partner about masturbation
  • How most relationships have a high desire person and a low desire person
  • Why you should support your partner’s masturbation
  • How masturbation helps your self esteem
  • How fantasy and porn can be the fuel for the fire
  • The importance of testosterone and your body rhythm
  • What’s different about the Babeland website

“Masturbation has lots of physical benefits, but it also opens you up to a happier and more fulfilled life.”  (Click to Tweet)

Links Mentioned:

 Facebook | Twitter | Instagram

“Sex is always happening, so it’s always age appropriate to talk about.”  (Click to Tweet)

Cauliflower Rice Recipe: Inspiration In The Kitchen

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I haven’t posted a new recipe in a while…

And I’ve felt a bit guilty about it.

I have been sharing a lot of new mindset tools from positive psychology that have made a big difference in my own healing journey, as well as my clients.

But at home, for myself and my family, I’ve been making simple foods, using high-quality ingredients, and keeping things pretty easy.

I just haven’t been focused on new recipes for a while…

It wasn’t that I’d lost my love for cooking, I just didn’t feel like a new greens recipe was as important as sharing these new tools I found so inspirational.

And it felt strange for a while, and I was plagued with doubts:

  • I’m a professionally trained healthy cook – why am I not excited about new recipes?
  • I know people want new recipes to inspire healthier eating – why can’t I just keep creating them?
  • Aren’t there already thousands of recipes online to choose from? Can I really add anything new?
  • Am I going to confuse my readers if I post mindset tools and then put up a recipe every once in a while?

So I didn’t create anything new for months. Until now, as I got really excited by this delicious new way of making cauliflower, quickly, with a few ingredients.

My programs and clients all still get recipe and menu planning help, when that’s what they need.

But I see more and more that having new recipes isn’t enough to help you make the lasting changes you want in your body and life.

I want to help you think about food and your body in a new way, using proven strategies that help you feel peaceful, strong, joyful, and whole. That’s the power of positive psychology and my mindset makeover tools, like those I teach in the Vitality Mentorship.

But I also love to eat, and I know you do too. I still cook every day, even if it’s whipping up a green + protein smoothie, tea, and a salad.

Well, I’ll be sharing new recipes when the inspiration strikes, rather than forcing myself to be a recipe hub.

Because as you probably know, forcing yourself to do things that you don’t feel totally juicy and excited about is a recipe for self-sabotage, frustration, and a loss of passion.

And I’ll continue to share nutrition + food tips because I know that our cravings and food habits stem from 4 roots causes: bacterial, nutritional, emotional, and physical.

So today, I’ve got a brand new way to whip up a family-pleasing cauliflower dish, filled with nutrition, that cooks up quicker than quinoa:

Cauliflower Rice Recipe:

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This recipe provides a delicate sweetness of cooked cauliflower, onion, and red bell pepper, which is my strategy to help with nighttime sugar cravings. Adding sweet foods at dinner satisfies my sweet tooth. I also like the high fiber content, which your body uses to get rid of excess estrogen.

1. Start with 1 head of organic cauliflower, washed and patted dry. Cut out the core and chop into large chunks.

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2. Place the chunks into a food processor fitted with an S-blade, and pulse 20-25 times, until cut into tiny pieces, but not mushy. You can also shred on a box grater.

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3. Set a large skillet over medium-high heat and add 2 tablespoons of coconut or olive oil. Dice 1/2 a yellow onion and red bell pepper, and saute with 1 teaspoon of salt until the onions begin to brown.

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4. Scoop the shredded cauliflower into the pan, and stir well. Cook for 5 minutes, adding another 1/2 teaspoon of salt. Stir well, and cover, turning heat to low, and cook for 5 minutes more.

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5. Turn off the heat and allow to steam for 2 minutes before serving hot.

Share with your loved ones, and save the rest for leftovers – reheating is a snap! Just add to a pan with 2-3 tablespoons of water, stir, cover, and heat over medium for 5 minutes or until heated through.

Enjoy!

xo,

Alex

 

P.S. Want a few cooking ideas like this, and help plotting your life’s transformation? Applications for the Vitality Mentorship program are open until June 10th:  

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