Death defying success (when you’re already successful)
Taking a big risk when you’re already “successful” feels twice as risky.
Maybe four times.
There’s a tiny voice inside that says you’ll lose it all if you take that risk.
The possible embarrassment of failing at something you really want, when you’re already seen as a bad-ass?
It feels like getting kicked out of the middle school lunch table crew all over again.
When you stand on the leading edge of possibility, it feels wild.
Death defying, in some ways.
The realness of succeeding at what you’ve hidden feels tangible.
The fear of failing at what you truly, secretly desire feels deadly.
You can taste and smell your desires coming your way.
And freak out:
Why did I dream this big?
Why did I start this?
Who encouraged me?
Why aren’t they here holding my hand?! MOmmmyyy!!
(that’s a direct transcript from my own past, by the way)
Sometimes “success” is a curse that keeps us from our next stage of evolution.
It can keep us from taking bigger risks in new directions, because we are afraid of losing what we’ve already created.
A personal tale:
When I finally told the world I wasn’t vegan anymore, after having co-produced a hit documentary about food, coached thousands of people how to use a vegan cleanse to detox their bodies, and written 3 books on vegan cooking, I felt like I was going to die.
I had to start eating meat again for my health and body’s well-being.
I also had to pivot my coaching, how I make a living, to start helping women get clear on their desires and pursue them with grit, creativity, and passion.
It felt death defying to give up how I had been living, the “successful” brand and life I’d created, and do something else.
My entire life, authenticity has been a core value.
To be genuine, honest, faithful, true to my truth.
Being false, even a bit, wasn’t possible.
But totally changing to be authentic, in full view of my friends, family, and the whole Internet?
THAT felt like stepping in front of a firing squad, after having handed a crowd of people a bunch of loaded rifles.
That’s why we keep our desires to ourselves.
We would rather suffer in silence than step in front of the firing squad.
Maybe you’re teetering on the edge, having bought the URL, read the books, secretly drawn up plans, cut and pasted your vision board.
Or perhaps not.
Maybe this desire is still your secret, it being so precious that bringing it out into the light might instantly destroy its magic.
HERE’S THE TRUTH:
If you keep it to yourself, the desire will shrivel and die.
And so will a piece of your soul.
Your desire needs lights, nourishment, and fresh energy to grow.
And I know, it seems upside down:
You’re already successful in so many areas of your life.
You’ve proven yourself over and over.
Why does this feel so scary?
Because you’re used to being a success.
And this desire feels like something you’ve never truly attempted before.
It feels spiritual, woo-woo, or so out of your comfort zone there’s no map.
And going after this desire brings you back to a place before you were a success.
Back when you didn’t know what you were doing.
Back when you could take risks and not fear “losing it all.”
Now you have more “all” to lose.
I’ve seen it happen, with clients and in my own life:
If you don’t pursue this desire, your life will suffer.
You’ll always secretly know that you let yourself down.
Eventually, feeling inauthentic is worse than not trying at all.
It feels worse than failing.
No failure is a true failure.
Each misstep is a piece of the puzzle.
Each failure is a part of the whole journey to becoming your next You.
Each “failure” is just a lesson learned on the path to your desires.
If you dedicate yourself to seeing it that way.
Are you ready?
I have space to invite three more driven women to work privately with me this Spring. Would you like to be one of them?
Just reach out to me now at firstname.lastname@example.org and type YES, and I’ll get back to you with the next step.
P.S. That feeling in your gut or solar plexus? That’s your YES. Email me: email@example.com