Your Inner Artist and Voice Matters: WHY I created Creatrix 2020
It hit me like lightening this morning: why this Creatrix 2020 Mentorship group matters so much, and why I’m dedicated to gathering, leading, and nourishing a group of womxn to create their visions right now…
… my heart is thumping as I type this out to you, but I hope if you share these same experiences that it will inspire, resonate, and motivate some deep growth and healing in you, too.
I felt so much shame growing up.
I grew up in a family where alcoholism, drug addiction, mental health issues, “starving artist” thinking, and multiple suicides came hand-in-hand with the creativity and brilliance.
The deep shame and fear from these traumas and dramas led to crippling Imposter Syndrome.
Which led to anxiety, perfectionism (more on that in a sec), fear of failure, and self-doubt.
The perfectionism would swing wildly between Super Gold-Star Achiever Mode and hiding out, terrified of being seen, playing s-m-a-l-l mode.
I saw my mother, a multi-talented artist, drown her creativity in sugar, codependent relationships, and money problems.
As a kid, we were broke a lot. Bankruptcy was declared.
I felt the force of divine creativity urging me on, but I didn’t believe I could be a creative person and have an abundant life with financial security. I didn’t know you could be sane, secure, and be a professional creative.
Yet, in the face of all that, I was part of an Oscar-nominated documentary team, published 4 books to some acclaim, and have created a successful business as a coach over the last 20 years.
I believe it was the earliest suicides that had a huge impact on me, and I grew up with the clear message:
Life is short. Nothing’s certain. Don’t waste time. Go after your dreams.
Got a problem? There’s a solution somewhere. Find it.
It wasn’t until mom died 6 years ago that something broke loose in me, and a deeper healing began:
With coaching and mentoring, I began to heal the old wounds of fear, self-doubt, and perfectionism that resulted from early traumas.
I faced my fears of groups of women, brought on by awful Mean Girl Bullying in middle school, and started to invest in and create communities for myself and other women.
The direct result:
- I’ve finally claimed my title as an Artist. (which is so deeply satisfying, I could pinch myself!)
- I no longer apologize for my creative visions (because I finally know it’s Source/Life/God working through me)
- I raised my prices so that my career finally supports me and my family (without the frantic hustle of scarcity-mindset)
- Book 5 is on the way (this August)
- My own son, just 13, has already declared himself an Artist and fully believes he can make a good living doing it (Hallelujah! That generational trauma is healed!!)
And now, back to YOU, and YOUR ideas, creative inspirations, and desires…
- I’ve talked with many women like you who have the deep desire to bring more creativity to their life and work, but aren’t sure how to do it.
“How do I make time for that?”
“How will that work in my relationship?”
- You’ve told me that you have this idea, maybe years old, that you are so excited about, yet fear failing at it.
“What if I fail? Won’t I feel like a failure as a person?”
“What if I succeed? Will everything have to change?”
- You want to profit from your creative ideas, but can’t see how to do that in a sane, safe way.
“Can I do this?”
“Are my ideas/art worthy of earning money?
So to answer the deep, underneath-it-all question:
YES, your ideas matter and are worth creating.
YES, your ideas are a result of Source/God/Life working its magic through you.
YES, you are deserving of living an abundant life while making your art/work.
YES. It’s possible to do all this…
And it requires a decision.
A decision to be in a committed practice of hearing and healing your own Imposter Syndrome.
A decision to show up and do the work every day (or at least a few hours a week, at first).
A decision to invest your energy and attention into your ideas.
A decision to stop hiding, show the work you’ve been playing with, and turn pro.
A decision to welcome the support and coaching of those who believe in you.
(*Ahem* Your Coach Alex)
A decision to welcome your Inner Creatrix to help lead your life.
Go here and see the details about the incredible 1-year long Creatrix 2020 Mentorship, which begins January 24th: https://alexandrajamieson.com/creatrix/
I’ll contact you once I privately read your application and we’ll talk in person about what you want to create, what challenges you’re facing, and whether the Creatrix 2020 is right for you.
No matter what you’ve been through I believe your ideas and creative vision matter.